Creating Compassionate Kids

Essential Conversations to Have with Young Children

Selected as a “Favorite Book for Parents in 2019” by Greater Good magazine, this book provides parents with a framework for using conversations that help their children become caring people. Each chapter focuses on a characteristic — such as compassion, self-awareness, and resilience — and provides parents with age-appropriate conversations that can help shape their children’s understanding of the world. 
270 pages. ©2019.
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Reader Reviews for this Book


Review posted April 12, 2021


Love having another tool to increase and expand my conversations with children in my class


Review posted January 24, 2021


I really appreciated the example conversations this book provided. There was such a diverse range of topics and family/kid backgrounds and experiences. I think every family, educator, and person who works with children should read this book!


Review posted January 15, 2021


"If you had to choose one word to describe the world you want your children to grow up in, what would it be?" This book goes through sincere examples of how to have compassionate conversations with children. It provides dialog of where to start.


Review posted December 26, 2020


Well written...I definitely feel like I have more understanding and approach things with more compassion now. I would highly recommend.

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Review posted December 20, 2020


This book has great ideas. Wish I had it when my boy was littler. I’ve already talked with families about the book and concepts in it. Has a great book list too.


Review posted December 18, 2020


This book was great, especially if you are a mental health practitioner and wondering about conversation starters that could help increase compassion for your clients. There are a lot of different topics from manners to gender orientation. This is less a book you would read cover to cover (it doesn't specifically have a good flow), it is more one that you would reference as topics come up in session.


Review posted December 17, 2020


I enjoyed reading this book. It's a very quick read and easy to follow. It doesn't have a lot of heavy scientific psychology jargon like other books I've read; rather this author is relatable and likable through her writing. The author uses real life scenarios and dialogue to prompt discussion and make points. Tominey's real life scenarios make her points of creating compassionate kids easy to remember and follow.

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Review posted December 15, 2020


I love the sample conversations and I think they make the lessons of the book easy to understand. It talks about the importance of talking with your child and breaks into chapters building self-awareness, fostering resilience, and promoting compassion. It gives a lot of model conversations. It also includes booklists for children. It's a must read.

Amie Thompson

Review posted November 18, 2020


Very informational and moving. A definite must read.


Review posted November 7, 2020


This book was easy to read with simple examples on how to effectively communicate with your children. Well organized to be able to return to trouble areas and freshen up later on.


Review posted November 4, 2020


Good read!

Janice I Woody

Review posted September 30, 2020



Lori Harch

Review posted September 24, 2020


I thought this book would be helpful for mentors in the Mt. Shasta Mentors program, and it would. The insights aren't earth-shattering, but they are insightful, and the example conversations are quite good. They make the information easy to digest and remember. This is a worthwhile read, one that I will share.


Review posted September 19, 2020


Measurably worthwhile book! Examples of conversations along with reasonings assist folks in having their own conversations. Plus, quite a few subjects were covered.


Review posted September 11, 2020


Having this conversation with kids is always important and even more so during the current times. Compassion, understanding and empathy need to be part of every kitchen dinner table. We must ensure that kindness prevails and our next generation of kids passes that along to their children. This is an important topic!


Review posted September 7, 2020


I enjoyed this book. It gave me good insite on how to approach some conversations with my students.


Review posted August 25, 2020


such a good book. lots of great tips and information about raising kids with compassion and providing empathy


Review posted August 22, 2020


I thought this book was great, and wish I would have known about it when my kids where even younger! The multiple examples of conversations given on each topic were very helpful. Even on topics I had already discussed with my daughter, I felt the way they were explained in the book gave me more and better ways to discuss them further. The book covered a variety of different topics to discuss, how to discuss them, and even gave titles of books to read with your children, as well as examples of activities to do with your children. It was very well written and I definitely recommend it to others!


Review posted August 12, 2020


I love the philosophy behind this book. Tominey really shines light on how important it is for parents to have meaningful conversations with their children. The sooner you start the better, but it's never too late! Our kids just need us to be real with them.


Review posted July 31, 2020


Really great informational book. Though I may not have kids of my own, I will definitely be using this book to help me in conversations with my younger cousins and nephews. So far has been a great tool!


Review posted July 16, 2020


Shauna Tominey explains clearly how to communicate with children so they will understand, learn, and become able to listen before commenting, which helps them gain social skills that are acceptable with others. When adults/teachers use the techniques offered their lives become more enjoyable and productive too! The book supports a win/win solution if the techniques are used appropriately!


Review posted July 10, 2020


I enjoyed this book and what an important topic to discuss. We can model compassionate behavior and talk with children about what compassion is in order to best prepare them for the transition to becoming a compassionate adult.


Review posted July 8, 2020


I loved the tone and concrete examples of important conversations to have with children. It helped to reinforce that these difficult topics shouldn't just be a one-time 'talk' but discussed all throughout a child's life and as opportunities for learning and teaching arise. Particularly in this challenging time right now, a book like this is so helpful and important.

onalee Mansor

Review posted June 24, 2020


Creating Compassionate Kids, Essential Conversations to Have with Young Children, covers the "tough" questions children ask with logical responses. The dialogs are real and I will use them with parents in my parenting class. Excellent book!

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Review posted May 21, 2020


This book gave me great insight into what is happening in my children's life right now.


Review posted April 27, 2020


Love this book. Lots of good points and from someone who had a really hard past it showed me some good ways to have the important conversations.


Review posted April 13, 2020


Very informative and educational


Review posted April 3, 2020


From the moment I heard the author speak at a training I knew I had to get a copy of her book. I work with ages 5-12 and it has a bunch of great ways to talk to kids ranging from sexuality, special needs and divorce. A must read for parents and childcare workers


Review posted March 31, 2020


This is a fantastic book. It had a lot of really good ideas for helping kids learn compassion for others


Review posted March 27, 2020


Love this one. A must have for any parent or educator’s collection.